Thursday, July 31, 2014

Why so selfish about Black Cats?

How can you resist this little fella?

Blackcat2

You can't right, well if that is the case then you don't take 'selfies' with your Cat!

Apparently there is a growing trend in the UK, and probably everywhere else for that matter, of giving away Black Cats because, and wait for this you won't believe it either! Black Cats don't look good in selfies - selfies are the self taken pictures taken by people who are preoccupied with err... themselves, which are then sent to friends, who haven't asked for them by mobile phones and tablets - Steve Jobs you have a lot to answer for!

It has been reported by no less an august organisation than the RSPCA that 70 per cent of more than 1,000 cats in their care in Britain are Black or Black and White and the same can be said for any number of animal sanctuaries around the UK.

Blackcat

First this Cat pleads with any nice, non-selfie taking people to adopt a Black or Black and White Cat as soon as you can, and secondly please stop anyone you see taking a picture with a 'cuter' Cat or at least get them to ask the Cat's permission first.

Lastly it was mentioned, and I only include this tidbit in passing, that Tabby and White or Tabby Cats are the most photogenic. In an unrelated matter, have you seen the cover of my book?





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

It's holiday time again!

One of my favourite European holiday destinations is Greece and the Greek Islands especially Paxos which are the smallest group of Ionian Islands.

In Greek mythology, Poseidon created the island by striking Corfu with his trident, so that he and wife Amphitrite could have some peace and quiet. Mind you the Greek islands are full of all sorts of nonsense like that, take as an example the famous Paxos Shopping Troll.

The famous Paxos Shopping Troll Greece

Not only is the shopping trolley provided for use in the shops but rather generously the shop allows you to take it home with you. No wonder the Greek economy is on its knees, of course the Germans are to blame in the main but I have to say that maybe if they didn't give a free shopping trolley with each trip to the shops they would not have such a large debt, but then the Greeks are big hearted people bless them.





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Another post about China

It's not that the local Communist Party officials in Heilongjiang province’s Tonghe County, China are terrified of senior Communist Party leaders, but when senior Communist Party leaders recently announced plans for a last-minute visit to the newly refurbished stadium in Heilongjiang province’s Tonghe County, China the officials decided to make sure that all the building work was finished.

The last bit of the jigsaw was the painting of the white lines on the track and so they worked night and day to accomplish what really aught to be the easy bit!

Sadly when daylight and reason dawned just before the senior Communist Party leaders arrival someone had a "hang on there a moment' moment, the lines showing the lanes on the track were painted at right angles.

90 Running Track

"Well it was faster than painting curves," one official admitted.

Now we can all laugh at this but really and truly the British shouldn't because every time that group of 'ordinary' people headed by the queen visit, the paint brush and so much more comes out in any town. Really those 'ordinary' people have no idea exactly what the country they live in looks like, but then it is rather difficult to see it when you spend most of your time in the sun when not visiting places where the paint has yet to dry.





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Monday, July 28, 2014

A little joke that the Chinese would never understand

Sometimes other languages translated into English produce wonderful results. Such as rather crude Prawns.

Fu King Tasty Amsterdam


With thanks from a Chinese restaurant in Amsterdam, I rest my case!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Friday, July 25, 2014

Work this one out!

A Thai restaurant in Japan

This is a Thai restaurant in Japan and I have a feeling that both nations may well have been involved in translating the name of the restaurant, stealing the typestyle from Coke and proudly sticking it outside their restaurant.

Cabbages and Condoms indeed, well I suppose it is original unlike stealing lettering from Coke.

Of course if you dear cuddly reader have another explanation I would be glad to hear it and the best selection will receive a copy of my latest ebook.





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Occasional English from China

Occasional English China

But what sort of English? If it anything like most things you can get in China it will be dreadful!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Marina Bay Gardens, Singapore is a very special place...

Yes Marina Bay Gardens, Singapore is a very special place because at long last someone has discovered the Lost World of Arthur Conan Doyle fame.

Oddly enough it isn't a subterranean world as described by the author who wrote Sherlock Holmes and spent too much time worrying fairies from Cottingley, oh no you'll find the way in on the 6th floor of Singaporean Hotel!

Lost and Found in Marina Bay Gardens Singapore

Well it doesn't look anything like what Sir Art. described does it? I feel let down, robbed and not only by the cost of entrance!

Gardens by the bay





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Romanian Honesty

Shops in the the states and Europe don't tend to be all that honest in their approach to enticing us the unsuspecting customer, with phoney discounts, rubbish made in China but with expensive 'labels' and so on. Which is why I thought that this sign in a Romanian shop was thoroughly refreshing.

Cheap crap Romania

I should point out that I don't think that sign refers to the Nestle, Kraft and Kinder products below though I suppose it might thinking about it!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Monday, July 21, 2014

More from the UK's geniuses.

We all respect someone who is clever, they always know what to say, they always do well in life, but sometimes it is nice to spare a thought for the 'others' who are... how can I put this without being rude? Um, err, I can't... spare a thought for others who are 'thick.'

Here in no particular order, just the way they planned their revision I suspect, are some more answers to exam questions from the UK's finest, though finest what we haven't quite put our fingers on yet.


Question: The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. Explain:

Answer: In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children,Cain,asked, ‘Am I my brother’s son?’


Question: Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed?

Answer: At the bottom.


Question: To change centimetres to metres, you…?

Answer: Take out centi.


Question: What is a vibration?

Answer: There are good vibrations and bad vibrations. Good vibrations were discovered in the 1960s.


Question: Name one of the early Romans’ greatest achievements:

Answer: Learning to speak Latin.


Question: What is meant by the term ‘hermaphrodite’?

Answer: Lady GaGa.


Question: What do we call the science of classifying living things?

Answer: Racism.


Question: A star in the sky suddenly brightens to many times its original brightness and then fades gradually over the next several years.Hypothesise what happened in terms of a star’s life cycle:

Answer: It just had a hot flash and is probably going through menopause.


Question: What is sexual bullying?

Answer: Punching someone in the vagina.


Question: Write two hundred thousand in figures.

Answer: Two hundred thousand in figures.


Question: What is the main reason for Divorce?

Answer: Marriage.


Studying hard


Yes studying is hard, that's why at the end of the word is 'dying!" Or so they say!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Friday, July 18, 2014

#Meet Justin

My youngest daughter just got a new Pushchair dangly thing, a Beaver (you can tell it's a Beaver by the faithful, natural colouring and design of course) and I was asked to give it a name.

Justin Beaver

Well in my book there could only be one name for such a handsome Beaver.
Dear cuddly readers please meet Justin Beaver, I called the new toy that because he does look rather like the... I'm sorry I had to go away and look up exactly what Justin Bieber did, apparently he is a Canadian singer-songwriter, dancer, and actor, well you learn something everyday!

JUSTIN BIEBER





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Dubai has everything you would want in a vacation destination

They say that Dubai has everything you would want in a vacation destination, but what do the people who live there think about the invasion of foreigners to say nothing about them being strictly non-believers.

Well I think that I have found the answer.

Call to let of steam in Dubai

Obviously if you are a local and disconcerted or angry about the number of tourists you can call the number on the back of the Toyota Pickup for a rant!

Hmm I would have thought that Dubai being something of an up market destination for the above average holidaymaker the "Call for a rant" organisation would have used a rather more luxurious automobile wouldn't you?

Have we at long last seen something from Dubai sans bling? Surely not! No don't worry it is still like Blackpool with Baubles or Vegas with (real) Gold leaf!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Is this sign for the English

Below is an election poster for a Romanian politician I wonder if it's for all the English people who expect millions of Romanians to migrate to England when they joined the European Union, only to discover that they err... didn't.

A sign from a Romanian politician is it for the English

But then who would want to make an appointment at a doctors and not be seen until you had cured yourself or died? Wait ten hours at an ER to be seen by an overworked teen in a white coat, to be poisoned by all of the fumes in London... need I go on?





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Oh dear! It's exam results time in the UK...

They say that Japan has the best education system in the world and believe it or not the UK is second, with South Korea third.

Well I don't know where they people who complied that list get their information from because according to the list of answers to reasonably easy questions (that a Cat could answer without reference, and I don't mean Google) a lot of students in the UK are very very dumb indeed.

Question: The first cells were probably…?

Answer: Lonely.


Question: Suggest one reason why it is a good idea to collect data by asking the public to observe when conkers open:

Answer: So the government doesn’t have to do it.


Question: What do the following chemical equations stand for - HCOONa:

Answer: Matata.


Question: Write an example of a risk:

Answer: This.


Question: When should a motorist use his or her bright beams?

Answer: When he wants to be an asshole


Question: Why are there rings on Saturn?

Answer: Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it


Question: Give a brief explanation of the meaning of the term ‘hard water’:

Answer: Ice


Question: What is the process for separating a mixture of chalk and sand?

Answer: A process called flirtation


Question: What is methane?

Answer: Methane is a smelly greenhouse gas which is produced when trees and or cows are burned.


Question: What is the meaning of the term ‘activation energy’?

Answer: It’s what is needed to get me up in the morning.


Terrible student

Every picture tells a story and pictures tend not to lie!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Monday, July 14, 2014

Dogs

I thought I would move away from pictures of badly translate and altogether daft signs today and share a couple of pictures of Dogs.

I like Dogs in the main, which is odd for a Cat but then most people seem to think I am an odd Cat so that sort of works doesn't it.

Dog 1

The first picture is for my pal Teagan, who I expect wishes that she was in that puddle with those pals.

If you go to Teagan's blog here Teagan Times you will see just why I think this puddle picture is perfect!

The second picture is for Dog lovers everywhere and needs no introduction, by a Cat, at least.

Dog 2





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Friday, July 11, 2014

A special salad that's all the rage in NY!

Uck!

I prefer to not know that the deli has put hair and nails in my salad.

A special salad thats all the rage in NY





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Really Norway!

Really Norway

I'm sorry, I know it's childish but 'Farts' get laughing me every time!





About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat's masterpiece of feline literature 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book 'The Cat's Travelogue' can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat's Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www - wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as "exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic."

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not 'Getting Out - Excerpts from a Cat's Diary' and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock's brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called 'The Trams of Prague'

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague - Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams





Don't forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator's heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes - what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the 'i's'?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it's called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.



Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75